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The Mother Connection

Former Chaplain Linda Miller, MDiv, MA, CTCA/Southwestern Regional Medical Center

For You created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Ps. 139:13-14

What is it that always draws us back to our mothers? Reflecting on this is almost too awesome to comprehend. Why do we have the longing, the pull deep within us to always have that mother connection?

It doesn't matter if we had a wonderful mom who braided our hair into long pigtails, cooked us warm soup on a cold wintry day, and tucked us into bed at night with a hug and a prayer, or a mom who stayed out late at night, left early in the morning, and served unappetizing TV dinners, we still long for that connection.

We want the touch of her hand, the warm and loving word that only she can give. Our hearts reach out to her. Whether young or old, a teen or a maturing middle-ager, we seek the connection -- that inner response that can only come through intimacy, and that of the deepest kind.

There in the safety of the warm, wet, protected world of the inner sanctuary, we begin our life-long journey together. All we know is hidden in the very fabric of our being.

Not aware of the connection, it just happens -- ordained from the very moment of conception. Our lives are forever intertwined. No matter how hard we try to deny, refute, or turn away from the connection, it's there for life.

Joy and sorrow, sunlight and rain, day and night, and birth and death make up the pattern of our lives. As with the fabric of a multi-tweed jacket, to remove the weave is to damage the piece. Damaged, but not destroyed. One thread is cut. Others lose their hold.

A little tattered. A bit less lovely. Until He comes.

With the ease of a Master, damaged threads are reworked. Broken connections smoothed -- a new design. Somehow ... mysteriously ... and perfectly ... the two are reunited ... connected again ... the journey continues ... only this time, forever.

What is your relationship with your mother? Is there unfinished business between you two? Are there walls built because of old hurts and resentments? If so, this is a great time to let them go. Maybe your mother was neglectful, abusive or she just didn't understand you. As you release forgiveness toward her, your heart will be set free. As you receive forgiveness for wrongs you've done to her, peace will enter your heart.

If your mother is still here, I hope you'll take time to give her a hug, or call and tell her some good news about your life. If she's in heaven, you can experience a little of her by thinking of the gift of life she gave you. Here are a few suggestions to help you honor your mother's memory. You could set time aside with family members to look through old photo albums or share a meal together on or around her birthday. Remembering our loved ones enriches our lives.

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